girls on the edge

I will not attempt to write a blog about girls, so perhaps I will focus more the 'on the edge' part, lol.  A couple months ago Dr. Sax published his book, girls on the edge, a sequel to his earlier publication of boys adrift.  Both books attempt to raise awareness of cultural issues that have influence on young people in gender specific ways.  I made mention of boys adrift in a previous blog, while this one will mention a few specifics jumped out to me from girls on the edge.

People ask important life questions such as: "Who am I?", "Who will love me?", and "What is my purpose?"  They typically form their identity based on their answers to questions like these.  The only way that anyone can be fully satisfied as a human is when their answers are founded upon Bible truth.  The people around us either help us discover these truths or help us create false ones.  Part of growing into adulthood is learning to form our own answers to these questions that are satisfying to us.  Girls on the Edge, explores many of the false identities that girls form in attempts to replace truth of God.  Some of these identity struggles from around a misunderstanding of sexuality, fake relationships and bullying through social networking, and obsessions including sports, body, and academics.

Throughout his cultural discussion, Sax raises many questions about the educational system in America suggesting that many young people would better thrive academically if they were in gender-specific classrooms, started school at a later age such as age 7, and received less pressure to learn.  He provides reasons for restructuring school subjects and curriculum so that students could grow interested in and explore topics rather than being force fed answers to questions that they haven't asked yet.  These suggestions are based on discoveries on how how boys and girls think differently at young ages.


Many people define their purpose based on things like their accomplishments, their job, their ability, what other people say they are, or say they are not.  The result is dissatisfaction and confusion.  For example if you define yourself as the start athlete and then you become injured it feels like you life is over.  Or if you find your purpose in impressing everyone and fail someone, then you become a failure rather than a person who made a mistake.

The only way to find true identity, love, and purpose is in Jesus Christ.  That way we find an identity that is outside of our ability.  We discover that we are God's chosen and they we are loved by Him.  We discover that the people in our lives who will truly love us are those that are willing to show us grace.  We are free to life now and for eternity.  We are free to love others and to show them Grace.

Sax does not definitively make the same conclusions that I have made.  He is simply commenting on his discoveries through his medial and social practice and research.  His intended audience is not conservative Christianity, but the common parent.  Nevertheless, I believe that his discoveries provide immense support for the Biblical Christian Worldview.

Experienced Grace

It is October.  Well, that's the obvious part, but there is some significance.  The first three things that come to mind with i think of October are my birthday, leaves falling off of the trees, and fresh apples/cider.  While in a week's time i will be a year older (i'll leave you to figure that one out), the leaves are turning, and i'm enjoying fresh cider as I write, there are other less annual things to share.  I have now been working on staff at Grove City College for over a month and am chronologically experiencing a new community and lifestyle in a place that i am actually returning to.  This month in Grove City has provided my with many opportunities to reflect on how grace is a part of everyday life.

"I hear and I forget.  I see and I remember.  I do and I understand."  This is a quote that recognizes the power of experiential education.  It might be a little brash.  Often i can hear and remember long enough to see what I've heard in action, and then go do myself.  However, I believe that one does not fully understand something until they have experienced it for themselves.

I have mentioned in previous blogs about how God has shown me the importance of showing His Grace to myself and to others.  The professional workplace, where everyone has their tasks do, can easily become a place lacking in grace.  Sometimes, this looks like people finding something insignificant, but somewhat offsetting, to complain about.  So they complain to someone who can't do anything about it, who then complains to someone else who can't do anything about, who complains to someone else who can't do anything about it, and so forth creating a nice big circle of complaints about something that is insignificant and can't be changed.  It is a challenge to step into the middle of such a cycle, receive the complain, and instead pass on a word of encouragement to the next person in the communication chain.  At other times grace vanishes from one on one communication through not accepting people when they make mistakes.

There are many situations that require us to respond with grace.  From my experience, I have found the hardest of these to be when I make a mistake and someone else refuses to show me grace for it.  This requires me to show grace to myself AND to show grace to the person who refuses to show grace to me.  A double measure of grace is required in these situations.

I have discovered that growing as a leader and manager of people requires that I grow in my understanding (experience) of God's Grace.  IE- God uses the people around me in my sanctification.  I am thankful for the ways that God is encouraging me.  Please pray that I will grow better at communication and discernment with those around me as I learn to live a more grace-filled life.

Transitions

Since my last post, my summer and GPA experience at HoneyRock has ended.  Thus, this will be my last post relating to HoneyRock things.  I do plan to keep this blog, but have eliminated the HoneyRock portion of the title.  I have not yet come up with a complete vision for this use of cyberspace, but I hope to continue to add life updates, things God has been teaching me, and possibly discuss current youth culture.  Regardless, stay tuned for interesting things to arrive on this space.

As summer camp came to a close, the adventure challenge team (my team) finished strong and hopefully left the programs that we were running in better shape that when we found them.  I also, at this time finished the work for my second graduate class, Adventure Challenge Education.  It was a real challenge to take this class in addition to doing summer ministry, but it directly related to what i was doing, so it was very beneficial.  The staff celebrated the end of summer by taking a day trip to Lake Superior where we swam, kayaked, and cliff jumped.  The water at Lake Superior is pollution free.  You can actually drink it if you want to.

Then we experienced some staff transitions and dove into running Wheaton Passage.  Wheaton Passage is a 2 credit class and camp program run by HoneyRock to assist student develop with the the freshman transition.  For those of you thinking Grove City College terms, this is freshman orientation on steroids.  Yet, this program is designed less to orient freshman towards the ways and policies of Wheaton, but is more to prepare freshman to have a life-changing college experience.  As a Passage Leader, I functioned somewhere between a camp counselor and a college RA.  It was a real joy to provide students with opportunities to develop their relationship with God, understand Biblical Worldview, develop and live in community with peers, grow in service, learn the art of reflection, and to have a lot of fun.

After Passage, I went camping on the shore of lake superior in the UP (upper peninsula of Michigan), dropped by Canada in Sault Ste Marie, and drove home. Yes, I did stop for lunch at a Pastie shop.

At home I immediately began working hourly for Grove City College to facilitate student technician training.  I had been hoping to do this upon leaving HoneyRock to get some extra cash.  However, prior to my arrival I was asked if i would be willing to join the staff team at a full time capacity.  I have excepted this job, and will officially be a full time salaried Media Services Technician at GCC starting tomorrow, September 1st.  This job will entail overseeing student technicians, providing technical support to campus needs, assisting with technical theater and classroom support as needed, etc.  Ironically, I have probably done more group development so far in this role than actually media.  My experience at HoneyRock has not gone to waste.

As you can see, I am in the midst of many large transitions, but am rapidly moving into what people call, 'the real world'.  This is both exciting and challenging.  I have experienced a good bit of culture shock.  This is somewhat related to moving from living in a cabin on a lake to town, but more has to do with differences in philosophical values between GCC and Wheaton.  Possibly, I will expound upon those in a later post.

In the next year, I hope to continue doing some graduate work at Wheaton relating to leadership in today's culture.  I also hope to visit my girlfriend Kate, who is living in Prague teaching school.  As I get connected in to GC, I also hope to continue working in youth ministry through connections that i have at my church.  More to follow on that as well.

Well...  Lots of big transitions.  One last phone from HoneyRock- just because I can. :)

This just isn't my thing!

Summer Camp is now in full swing at HoneyRock.  In fact the first sessions of several programs are coming to a close this week.  My role lately has been primary centered around coordinating between all of these programs to schedule and staff ropes course activities many of which i have also been facilitating.  I have also been busy trying to complete the coursework and projects for the class that i took this spring, Adventure Challenge Education.  On one level this has made life more stressful.  On the other hand, I am studying the things that I am doing each day.  It is exciting to read about facilitation and leadership, write about it, and then go try out the things that i learned the next day with a group.  Many times this has made me a better facilitator and more aware of what how I contribute to the groups that I am working with.  So I have spent many hours helping groups and individuals grow in self-awareness, self-confidence, and in their relationship with God.  Sometimes these things happen more directly than others, but I had the unique opportunity to share the gospel with a girl on top of the zip line platform last week.  It didn't go through (neither did she jump off the platform to ride the zip line), but many seeds were planted.  This last week, I also had the wonderful blessing of having a very dear friend of mine here visiting and volunteering :).

Here is a glimpse what I do:

As you can see contrary to the title of this blog, this clearly IS my thing.  I really do enjoy working with groups and encouraging them to grow.  Yet, "This just isn't my thing" or some variation of this statement in an  increasingly popular method of dealing with or running away from challenging situations.  I have been hearing this statement out of campers mouths almost every day.  I estimate based on my experience that 1/8 of girls respond this way and 1/4 to 1/3 of boys.  This estimate is not age specific, but rather I have observed this in elementary, middle school, and high school.  The real challenge for these young persons in not doing a challenge, but being willing to even try a challenging or new experience.  These persons lack confidence, courage, and often physical ability as well.  In much of my previous experience working with youth, this type of person would typically try things and then with some encouragement pull through to complete the challenge while gaining confidence, courage, and often physical ability.  The challenge for me has been more with getting people to try, rather than encouraging them to succeed.  Often the reasons behind such a statement are usually very deep and are often related to home environments.  As for the ratio difference between girls and boys; read the book, Boy's Adrift by Dr Sax.  Guys are currently struggling to cope with the pressures of American culture more than girls while many of both genders are not equipped to deal with life.  Pray for the youth of our nation.  Encourage your friends and children to try new things, take risks, and not back down when things become uncomfortable.

The Fear/Trust paradox

Hi all!  Things are going well here at HoneyRock.  I am now in the middle of session 2 of WIN.  The SLS students (aka the summer counselors) are also taking classes now for a total of 8 different college classes happening at once here at HoneyRock.  This last weekend held a trip to Wheaton to drop off session 1 students and pick up session 2 followed by activities to get to know the new group of students.  Today Rob officially moves back to HoneyRock from his sabbatical.  We are excited to have him back.

One thing that I've learned over the last few weeks is what I am calling the Fear/Trust paradox.  I have come to believe that fear of life and trust in God are opposites while fear of God and trust in God are almost synonymous.  For the sake of discussion we will look primarily at Psalm 112.  In verse 1, "Blessed is the man who fears the Lord".  Then in verse 7 we read that, "He [a righteous man] will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord."  This is similar to the more often quoted Philippians 4:6, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."  When we put trust in the Lord then the worries of the world, our everyday lives, are put into focus.  The opposite is also true.  When we put our trust in ourselves or our ability to fix a problem then we continually worry about about it.  When we are really honest with ourselves, we realize that we are filled with fear.  Fear of failure, fear that someone will find out we aren't perfect, fear that someone we love will let us down, fear that God won't fulfill his promises, fear that we will be out of job, fear that our accomplishments aren't worth anything, etc.  1 John 4:18 says that, "Perfect love drives out fear".  God loves us.  Our identity is in Him, not in what we do our a position that we hold.  Because God loves us we can put our trust in him.  There is no fear when we trust in God, b/c His love is greater than our fears in life.  Thus, I believe that being a Christian means first and foremost putting our trust in God.  Often we try to cover up for our lack of trust by achieving a certain level of morality that makes us look good.  Thus, we are perceived as religious, but the reality is we are completely lacking faith and trust in God.  Rather, we are actually putting our faith and trust in ourselves.  I'm not discrediting morality, but am saying that it should be a by-product of a relationship with God that is based on trust.  Being a good person does not change God's view us and carries no weight for salvation (Romans 5:8).

These thoughts have greatly changed my perspective on life.  Maybe they will encourage your heart also.
Blessings...

Summer is here! well almost...

Summer has officially come HoneyRock style with the arrival of over 100 Wheaton college students!  Some are here to take 2 week classes called WIN (Wheaton in the North Woods).  There are 2 sessions of WIN for a total of 4 weeks.  Some students are here for the SLS program (Summer Leadership School).  These students will take a college class, go through staff training, and then become the Residential Camp and Advance Camp counselors.  Many others are arriving to be on staff for various positions such as maintenance, kitchen, activity area staff, etc.

The transition for me is the completion of my classes and training.  Now I am working with 2 others under Rob, the director, to plan and implement 3 programs: challenge course, WIN, and camp worship.  Through delegating responsibilities I am primarily responsible for Adventure Challenge.  Ei: scheduling and facilitating groups.  However, I also help with the others.  This week I have been primarily focused on connecting with the WIN students.  The last several weeks I have been doing ropes course training and helping with building and maintenance.  Here is a glimpse of maintenance day:

The outdoor practical training involved doing and learning to facilitate all of the high and low elements.  We also enjoyed (not really) a small snow storm in the middle of the week:

I also took a graduate class in adventure challenge education.  While I learned a lot about how to better facilitate and be attentive to the needs of adventure groups, the class ended up feeling more like life counseling.  I was able to discover many ways I can and need to grow as a leader and how to better listen to and serve the needs of those around me.  I am excited to put these things into practice with the upcoming summer of ministry.

My transition into the summer is also marked by me moving into new housing.  Fortunately, I moved into my non-heated cabin a few days AFTER the snowstorm.  However, I fully value lots of blankets since it is still pretty cold at night this time of year :).  The rest of my cabin mates are trickling in as their summer roles require them to move up to HoneyRock.  I now live right on the lake front by the canoes!

Wildlife: I've seen a family of black bear and several loons.  There are actually leaves on the trees as of this week.

Prayer: Pray that the lake fills up.  It is abnormally low due due to a rather large drought that we are experiencing (rumored at the worst in 37 years).  It is low enough that it may effect waterfront programming.  Also, pray for all of the Wheaton students and counselors that have just arrived that they would connect with God and with each other over the next month.

School?

A year ago, I would never have thought that I would be doing what I am doing now.  Grad school?  Well, not for real (at least yet).  However, I am in the process of completing my first ever graduate level course in the Theology and Practice of Outdoor Ministry.  This has probably been the best class I have ever taken for a couple reasons.  First, it is about a topic that I am become more passionate about.  Second, the class format was more of a seminar rather than lecture creating quality discussion.  In general we discussed: spiritual formation, outdoors/creation, temporary and church community, leadership, learning, and philosophy of ministry.  Our discussion of these topics was very beneficial to me as I pursue further ministry opportunities.


This week I will be traveling around to visit other camping ministries in Wisconsin to evaluate them based on the lessons learned in class.  This should be fun because a lot of the people we will be talking to we have already met through church, broomball tournaments, and the CCCA conference.


I have been doing a lot of reading lately for class and personally.  Several of these books I would recommend:
Boys Adrift- Sax; discussion of culture and its affects on young men
Embracing the Love of God- Smith; a refreshing understanding of Grace
The Making of a Leader- Clinton; the process of lifelong growth in leadership
Last Child in the Woods- Louv; evidence for engaging with Creation


It is an incredible blessing to live in a place that not only is dedicated to God, but is also beautiful.  As it starts to turn spring this place still reminds me of Narnia (CS Lewis' fantastical land).  There are lots of birds, deer, squirrels, etc running around everywhere.  I am especially fascinated by the lake.  It is always there and always different.  Spiritual metaphor?...  What a blessing to be able to go wading, canoeing, and to sit by the shore and watch the sun rise and set.

Things here at HoneyRock are full speed ahead gearing up for summer.  There is much preparation to do yet, another cabin to build, lots of volunteers and students coming, and I will be taking another graduate class that will also be a part of my training at the beginning of May

Blessings,

Matt