girls on the edge

I will not attempt to write a blog about girls, so perhaps I will focus more the 'on the edge' part, lol.  A couple months ago Dr. Sax published his book, girls on the edge, a sequel to his earlier publication of boys adrift.  Both books attempt to raise awareness of cultural issues that have influence on young people in gender specific ways.  I made mention of boys adrift in a previous blog, while this one will mention a few specifics jumped out to me from girls on the edge.

People ask important life questions such as: "Who am I?", "Who will love me?", and "What is my purpose?"  They typically form their identity based on their answers to questions like these.  The only way that anyone can be fully satisfied as a human is when their answers are founded upon Bible truth.  The people around us either help us discover these truths or help us create false ones.  Part of growing into adulthood is learning to form our own answers to these questions that are satisfying to us.  Girls on the Edge, explores many of the false identities that girls form in attempts to replace truth of God.  Some of these identity struggles from around a misunderstanding of sexuality, fake relationships and bullying through social networking, and obsessions including sports, body, and academics.

Throughout his cultural discussion, Sax raises many questions about the educational system in America suggesting that many young people would better thrive academically if they were in gender-specific classrooms, started school at a later age such as age 7, and received less pressure to learn.  He provides reasons for restructuring school subjects and curriculum so that students could grow interested in and explore topics rather than being force fed answers to questions that they haven't asked yet.  These suggestions are based on discoveries on how how boys and girls think differently at young ages.


Many people define their purpose based on things like their accomplishments, their job, their ability, what other people say they are, or say they are not.  The result is dissatisfaction and confusion.  For example if you define yourself as the start athlete and then you become injured it feels like you life is over.  Or if you find your purpose in impressing everyone and fail someone, then you become a failure rather than a person who made a mistake.

The only way to find true identity, love, and purpose is in Jesus Christ.  That way we find an identity that is outside of our ability.  We discover that we are God's chosen and they we are loved by Him.  We discover that the people in our lives who will truly love us are those that are willing to show us grace.  We are free to life now and for eternity.  We are free to love others and to show them Grace.

Sax does not definitively make the same conclusions that I have made.  He is simply commenting on his discoveries through his medial and social practice and research.  His intended audience is not conservative Christianity, but the common parent.  Nevertheless, I believe that his discoveries provide immense support for the Biblical Christian Worldview.

Experienced Grace

It is October.  Well, that's the obvious part, but there is some significance.  The first three things that come to mind with i think of October are my birthday, leaves falling off of the trees, and fresh apples/cider.  While in a week's time i will be a year older (i'll leave you to figure that one out), the leaves are turning, and i'm enjoying fresh cider as I write, there are other less annual things to share.  I have now been working on staff at Grove City College for over a month and am chronologically experiencing a new community and lifestyle in a place that i am actually returning to.  This month in Grove City has provided my with many opportunities to reflect on how grace is a part of everyday life.

"I hear and I forget.  I see and I remember.  I do and I understand."  This is a quote that recognizes the power of experiential education.  It might be a little brash.  Often i can hear and remember long enough to see what I've heard in action, and then go do myself.  However, I believe that one does not fully understand something until they have experienced it for themselves.

I have mentioned in previous blogs about how God has shown me the importance of showing His Grace to myself and to others.  The professional workplace, where everyone has their tasks do, can easily become a place lacking in grace.  Sometimes, this looks like people finding something insignificant, but somewhat offsetting, to complain about.  So they complain to someone who can't do anything about it, who then complains to someone else who can't do anything about, who complains to someone else who can't do anything about it, and so forth creating a nice big circle of complaints about something that is insignificant and can't be changed.  It is a challenge to step into the middle of such a cycle, receive the complain, and instead pass on a word of encouragement to the next person in the communication chain.  At other times grace vanishes from one on one communication through not accepting people when they make mistakes.

There are many situations that require us to respond with grace.  From my experience, I have found the hardest of these to be when I make a mistake and someone else refuses to show me grace for it.  This requires me to show grace to myself AND to show grace to the person who refuses to show grace to me.  A double measure of grace is required in these situations.

I have discovered that growing as a leader and manager of people requires that I grow in my understanding (experience) of God's Grace.  IE- God uses the people around me in my sanctification.  I am thankful for the ways that God is encouraging me.  Please pray that I will grow better at communication and discernment with those around me as I learn to live a more grace-filled life.